TEARS

They roll down when I am happy

They roll when I am sad

They just simply find their way-

When I get emotional

Or even when I go mad.

People say I am an ‘emotional fool’

For weeping always ‘isn’t so cool’.

So, I try a lot to control them

But, damn!!! You see somehow they just find their way again.

I pray to them, “please stop, stop, and stop”

 

They answer me, “‘ma ’lady fear not”.

My quivering lips then loses their words

In an attempt to stop them but all a gust

They whisper slowly as they flow

“We indeed are making you stronger though”.

People call me an ‘educated illiterate’

Use and throw me like a rug, straight.

These tears, give me their friendly hug then,

Helping me to rise up with wisdom and fight again.

From my birth till today they have never betrayed me though

They slowly come, soothe me and help me go with the societal flow.

Some people like to party when they are sad

Want to fool society with mask of happiness even when incidents turn them mad.

Fearing that, shredding tears would make them look feeble and bad.

Thus, wearing the mask of flamboyancy all day long,

They just try to be happy all time along

Alas! But these adamant tears somehow find their way in loneliness

Ripping the scared soul apart

That never again can trust anyone.

Waiting like a desert for rain, 

The wounded soul tries to find the peace again,

Which can soothe it and help it heal.

But then, how can one find it with a mask on face?

Rip off the mask over your face,

Rip off the mask over your face,

And face the world even when you are apace

For we all aren’t in any race

Cry, laugh, smile, fear

For these emotional help us in bearing the societal tears

Let the emotions come out let them flow-

Then only your positivity will glow. 

Joyeeta Talukdar

08/04/2016

An Inspiration

Women’s Day is over!!!!!!! Nooooooo Neverrrrrrrrrr

 Every girl’s mother shall always be her first inspiration whose experience cannot be expressed in words. But, besides 'ma' there are many others who are so close to one’s heart and inspire you so much that it's hard to express your feelings towards them.

I write this post dedicated to one of the inspirational personalities of my life' Panna ba (didi/elder sister)'- Miss Panna Bharali. She calls me 'pagoli-mad girl'.

                    I had met “Panna ba” on the first day of graduation, my senior and roommate.

Being the district level badminton player from Dibrugarh, Assam she was summoned as the “Stupendous sports personality” of CPMS College, Guwahati. She ran and till today runs environment awareness NGO, “Irab-Kirab” on her elder sister’s behalf who was also an environmentalist and had fought against ovarian cancer till the end. This NGO educates students on aspects of how one should love and respect the environment they live in. This NGO has undertaken various projects where they want people to understand the importance of environment in their life and ways of safeguarding it without. 

“Irab-Kirab” aims to make this environment a suitable juncture of living without exploiting it.

Presently, Hospital Administrator in National Health Mission, Tinsukia Panna ba has defeated breast cancer with utmost courage and positivity.

Miss Panna Baharali a dutiful daughter, successful women, loyal friend, a traveller but overall a real life hero indeed who never complains but always fights the obstacles of her life with a smiling face. Never have I witnessed tears in her eyes. Not that she is emotionless but she knows tears are not the solution of any problem.

I had seen her lead an utmost disciplined life which helped her to be focus always. I guess her this discipline has helped her to be a fighter and remain focussed to defeat her enemy “cancer”.

When I first heard the news about her I couldn’t believe my ears. So after gathering all my courage I called her. I asked her, “Ba, where are you?”

Panna ba replied, “I am at B. Borooah Cancer Institute, right now undergoing my treatment for breast cancer”.

I was dumbfounded and swallowed a big gulp of emotions. She was my roommate who owed the bed next to me. I was with her for almost a year. She used to wake me up in the morning every day. Bring my breakfast, lunch and dinner. Scold me when I didn’t study. Laugh hard at my idiotic madness’s spoil me by bringing the food stuffs I liked to eat. In short she treated me like a small chap, cared me, nursed me and just loved me.

I questioned myself, “Is this reality? Is this the truth? No, it cannot be Panna ba. How can God be so merciless?”

Panna Ba said from the other side of phone, “its O.k dear. I shall be alright.”

I remained silent. I was at the loss of words. I felt so helpless. There was hollowness all within me and coldness prevailed. My hands quivered and at a moment the phone slipped away. I thought, “The hospital where I go to meet patients and see them suffering everyday there among the patients one is Panna Ba”.

My mind imagined the patients whom I meet but all had the smiling face of Panna ba. I knew the pain she was passing through but why am so helpless.My heart sank and darkness prevailed in front of my eyes. Grasping the seat near me I somehow managed to sit.

Panna ba said from the other side, “Hey emotional pagoli chill. I am O.K. Your Panna ba is O.k.”

Tears rolled down from my eyes and I heard Panna ba saying, ““Crying on fate will worsen your today, better get up and fight to enjoy a best tomorrow”.

I understood what she meant and wiping my tears I replied, “Ba we shall party next time we meet”.

Panna Ba replied, “Of-course we shall”.

I wish Panna ba all good in her life and want her to know that indeed she is a strong lady who lives life on her own demand and has shown life what an awesome fighter she is.